06 May, 2009

If for some reason you're still reading this . . .

Mike Kushnir is spearheading a project to travel from Vancouver to Albany, Oregon using only public transit. Mike left with Mathieu Goupil-Lemay earlier this week and I will be joining them in Seattle on Friday. You can follow our progress at www.i5chronicles.com.

I don't know what is going to happen to the DA next year.

-Aaron Palm

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11 April, 2009

Douchebag Threat Level Orange

Today's Douchebag Threat Level is ORANGE

Stay safe.

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10 February, 2009

Another open letter to Blake Frederick

Dear lover,

A lot has passed in the time since I first wrote you regarding my appreciation and my vote. I want you to know that since that fateful night I accepted the invitation to your house, I have never missed one of your debates, and my vote has always been for you. (Well, I make exceptions for Andrew Carne, but he's just such a hunk of an engineer.) You've always shown personality and spunk, darling, and despite having to share you with Emily "let's embarrass Alex Monegro" Griffiths - who I'm still jealous of - I felt very special for having the future 100th AMS President in my life.

So Blake, how did you think I would feel when I heard the news? Really, did you think of my feelings at all? I mean, I always knew you had... tendencies, but to run off with a whole slate, Blake? And worse, to have the evidence captured on video and camera? To me, that's worse than Paris Hilton's sex video - and likely a whole lot worse for your career. I hear you did it up against the walls of UBC, you did it in classrooms - hell, you probably did it in the AMS offices!

I wish we were married, Blake, only so that I'd have my day in court like you'll have yours. As it is, I have to suffer lonely and without any recompense, watching my one-time bedrock of virtue and goodness get slagged in the media and by uncompromising and bleak email statements from she-who-does-rule-from-on-high, Sarina.

Actually, I should have known better, Blake. I always seem to fall for the bad boys. Just think, before I met you I was falling hard for Mr. Flyerfuck himself, the dreamy Alex Lougheed... though that had to end after he put his 'ballot' in twelve other boxes. I thought I'd moved on to a better man, but my bad luck streak continues. Hopefully my next choice of man-love, a certain romantic young VFM coordinator, will do better to uphold the standards of democratic monogamy I look for.

Somewhere deep in my heart, dear, I believe that you are innocent, and if that day comes, I will likely run back to you with open arms, saying "I voted for him! I believed in him all along!". But until then, I just can't bring myself to show my face with yours in public. I felt especially ashamed when you pulled the Durganesque move of accusing a facebook group of comprising a slate, just by giving an endorsement to your rival. A little more of me wanted Paul Korczyk as my President right then. What can I say, Blake, I'm as fickle as the blogosphere and much less optimistic. You've broken my democratic heart on your cold slate tablet, and I want it back in one piece.

Seriously yours,

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09 February, 2009

New Feature!

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Here begins the Inquisition

Statement of the Inquisitor:

It has been brought before the Inquisition that the following have committed offenses of great Hearsay against the faith:

Edward Lee Durgan charged with six counts general silliness (not knowing when to quit) and one count assault of the honour of the Devil's Advocate

Blake Frederick charged with one count general silliness (not knowing when to quit)

UBC Student Media blog charged with six hundred and sixty-six counts of lacking sense of humour.

Read the verdict of the Inquisition behind the jump.

Statement of the Inquisitor:

Regarding the case of Edward Lee Durgan

"Papa Durgan" submitted six complaints to the Elections Committee. You may read of them at the Radical Beer's blog (the Inquisitor does not suffer Itself to lern HTML - click the sidebar link yourself)

All of his complaints were dismissed by the EA as lacking in substance. At best, they were mildly funny. At worst, they demonstrated a complete lack of understanding of Elections Code. Research: something a PhD student at UBC should understand.

While the Inquisition wants to side with Durgan because we share his rage with the AMS, which will soon face Judgment in the eyes of the Lord, Durgan's lack of tact became apparent when he dared to accuse the Devil's Advocate of being a slate along with the Radical Beer Tribune. VFMs are not candidates. Slate rules do not apply.

For six counts of silliness and one count assault on the honour of the DA, the Inquisition finds Edward Lee Durgan GUILTY.

Blake Frederick submitted a complaint regarding an endorsement message sent out by a Facebook group. For one count Not Understanding Freedom of Speech and one count Not Knowing When To Quit the Inquisition finds Blake GUILTY.

The Inquisition does not know where to start with the UBC Student Media Blog. From their general lack of humour, to their biased coverage, to their shameless attacks on others, to hiding behind their claims of impartiality, to their lack of analysis, to their shameful web design,to their whoring of CookieGate, the Inquisition finds UBC Student Media GUILTY.

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06 February, 2009


A shit storm started in the Blogosphere tonight with an email allegedly from the Election's Admin stating that Blake Frederick has been disqualified.

The email was sent from a personal Gmail account on a Friday night that has no link to Sarina other than name (and the same one that sent out the oh so silly CookieGate email) All other contact the DA has received from Sarina has been through the official elections email - (Elections@ams.ubc.ca)

Sure, it could be real, but is likely misinformation planted by pro-Keg activists in a last ditch attempt to seize the reigns of power. Everyone else can go to sleep.

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I owe Gerald Deo another beer.

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04 February, 2009

Your 2009 AMS Executive

Don't blame me. You voted for them (though likely for second place). In case you can't identify the five heads of the hydra, you elected:

VP Finance - Tom "this is what I study" Dvorak
VP External - Tim "I'm small don't hurt me" Chu
VP Administration - Crystal "not Tristan" Hon
VP Academic - Johannes "oral vetting" Rebane
President - Blake "slim margin of error" Frederick

And for Board of Governors, you elected Michael "elect me baby, one more time" Duncan, and Bijan "oops, I got elected again" Ahmadian.

Don't blame us - we disendorsed most of them.

Oh - and congrats. Thanks to you candidates, democracy at UBC was saved from the grasps of Kommander Keg. Thanks to the RBT for our results.

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